This fortunately rare but unsettling condition occurs in multi-track podcasts where each speaker has been recorded on a separate audio track. The cause is usually inattentive editing, such as cutting a background noise out of one track without shortening other tracks to match. (Just use a reverse-amplify effect on that segment instead of removing it.) In some cases, tracks are badly aligned from the beginning, due to inexperience at producing “double-ender” shows.

The effect is a combination of long pauses and overlapping voices. There may be a long silence after the host asks a question and before the guest begins to answer, and then the host will appear to interrupt the guest to ask the next question—but the guest will not notice this, and will go right on speaking. This is because there was no interruption in the actual conversation—it’s only the audio tracks that are out of alignment.

Some tricks to avoid Podcast Dyschronia include starting your show with a count or clapper (yes, just like those clapper boards you see in movies about making movies) and locking voice tracks together for editing once you have them lined up, so any cuts to one track are made to both.

Doing this will save headaches and frustration for the podcaster, and bafflement and annoyance for the listener.

Some podcasts force listeners on a veritable roller coaster of loudness and softness, endangering their lives (or at least their hearing) as they force them to keep adjusting the volume on their MP3 players while engaged in what should be hands-free activities like cycling and driving.

Fortunately for us all, the engineers over at the Conversations Network invented a miracle cure for this condition. It’s called the Levelator®, and all you have to do is drag your audio file onto it. It magically evens out these differences between speakers and segments and makes everything nicely audible. Just don’t apply it to music tracks!

Some podcasts are doubly afflicted. Not only do they suffer from Podcastus Incognitus, but their hosts have come down with Anonymitis as well.

It’s easy to identify Anonymitis when listening to a podcast episode, because you can’t identify anything else. The host doesn’t tell you the name of the show, the name or number of the episode, or his or her own name, but assumes the listener will automatically know these things.

While long-time listeners will probably recognize the host’s voice and the intro music (if any), new listeners are left completely without cues, and feel shut out. Even if the podcaster has remembered to include ID3 tags with all the relevant information, the listener may not be able to look at the player screen. And even the regular listeners may have several episodes backed up and want to be sure this is one they haven’t heard before.

Remember that every show you produce may be someone’s first. Identify yourself and your podcast at the beginning of every episode.

Darth Co-hosting is caused by breathing directly into a sensitive microphone pick-up. The result is a sound to put the George Lucas character of Darth Vader to shame.

Listeners may be able to tolerate this overpowering sound  if it only occurs during pauses between speech, but if one person’s breathing drowns out another person’s voice, they are unlikely to abuse their ears in the attempt to make out the conversation, no matter how valuable the conversation.

To determine whether you might be suffering from Darth Co-hosting syndrome, make sure you listen to your own podcast recording before you publish it. (Your listeners might not tell you—they will just stop listening.)

Treatment for this condition is usually  simple: move the microphone, particularly a headset boom, out from under the nose or further away from the mouth. It may also be helpful to switch  from a condenser mic to a dynamic mic, and to use a pop filter.

Details

Saturday, June 11, 2011
9 a.m. – 5 p.m.

TechLiminal
268 14th Street
Oakland, CA 94612

Cost: $197

Topics

• Choosing and refining your topic
• Show length and frequency
• Show format (e.g. number of hosts, interview style, live call-in show)
• Involving your listeners: comment lines, blog comments, forums, and more
• A few basic microphone tips
• Recording devices
• Intros and outros
• Podsafe music and other copyright issues
• Audacity
• Levelator
• MP3 file format: Bit rate, sample rate, stereo vs. mono
• Show notes
• Listener statistics
• Media hosting
• Podcast plugins
• iTunes and other podcast directories
• Promoting your podcast
• Podcatchers and alternate subscription methods: Stitcher, iPhone apps, etc
• Common mistakes and how to avoid them

Register now—only 8 spaces available

I’ve been using audio on the Web for about seven years, and podcasting since 2005. Along the way, I’ve managed to learn many techniques that have been helpful to me in my own podcasts and in the hundreds of podcasts I have produced for clients. And I’d like to help you too.

That’s why I’m offering a free webinar called “Take Your Podcast to the Next Level.” During this 30-minute Web-based seminar, we’ll talk about simple, practical things you can do to improve your podcast – from content to audio quality to search engine optimization (SEO). This free webinar will take place on Wednesday, June 1, 2011 at 2 p.m. Eastern time.

Please reserve your spot today. Send an email right now to register. Attendance is limited. By the way, all you need to attend is a computer (with speakers) and an Internet connection. And perhaps a comfy chair.

Bonus: All attendees get a copy of the newly revised Podcaster’s Checklist, a three-page document filled with tips to improve your podcast.

Photo by Adam Pengelly

This bizarre condition seems to afflict at least one prominent podcaster or social media pundit every year and has since before the Asylum was founded.

Podcastus Moriturus is easy to diagnose: its primary symptom is the inescapable compulsion to get up and declare “Podcasting Is Dead!” in a public forum. This, in turn, causes the rest of the podcasting community to break out in a rash of scornful denials—all of them repeating the highly contagious and contentious phrase.

Fortunately, Podcastus Moriturus will subside on its own if simply ignored, but it’s guaranteed to break out again.

Here are just a few examples of Podcastus Moriturus in the wild:

• Podcast Alley Forum: Podcasting is DEAD! (2005)
• Marc Freedman, “Podcasting Is Dead! Long Live Podcasting” (2005)
• Chris Coulter, “Why Podcasting Blows” (2006)
• Read/Write Web “Will Podcasting Survive?” (2007)
• Michael Geoghegan, “No More Podcasting in the New Media Expo” (2007)
• Cameron Reilly, “Why Podcasting is Dead in the Water” (2007)
• Alexander Wolfe, “Is Podcasting Dead?” (2008)
• Leesa Barnes: “Unprofitable Podcasters Claim Podcasting Is Dead” (2008)
• Chris Knudsen: “Confirmed: Podcasting Is Dead” (2008)
• Neville Hobson: “Is Business Podcasting Dead?” (2008)
• Joseph Jaffe: “Is Podcasting Dead or Not?” (2008)
• Scott Whitney: “Podcasting Is Dead. Long Live Podcasting?” (2008)
• Michael Geoghegan: “Podango: Bankruptcy Looming?” (2008)
• Leo Laporte, Online News Association 09 Keynote (2009)

Locus Confusus is a serious condition because it prevents people from listening to or sharing podcasts because they don’t know where to find the podcast files on their computers.

Fortunately, it is not usually necessary to hire a private detective. This disease can be cured with a little information. A quick look at the “Preferences” or “Options” in your podcatcher’s menu will reveal the location of the downloaded files, allowing the anxious subscriber to listen at last.

In the course of writing this book, Penny Haynes posed a LinkedIn question asking to talk to business owners who had never used audio or video to market themselves. I was hard put to think of anyone besides my mother. It’s not just that I know a lot of podcasters and vidcasters. I’ve spent my time in industries where people have used audio and video to market themselves for decades.

Back when I was teaching Greek and Roman drama, I made video recordings of all my productions. The first client whose book I helped write gave me audiocassettes with recordings of his class lectures to turn into book chapters. Nearly everyone I’ve worked for since has used some form of video or audio—including the old-fashioned “getting interviewed on radio and TV” format.

The only difference between that and what Penny talks about in this book is that most of the audio and video recordings used as “demo reels” or sold as products before 2004 weren’t digital, and they weren’t online.

The rapid growth in both the tools for creating digital media and the bandwidth for sharing it just mean there more ways to use audio and video for your business. More than 101 of them, in fact. Penny lists 103 and then provides some additional ideas in the Sample Projects section at the end of the book.

I defy anyone who reads it not to think of some way to use these tools for his or her business. And I’d be surprised if those of you already using audio and video don’t discover new applications. My favorite discovery was one Penny also mentioned in a recent interview with Anna Farmery: turning audio into video by adding slides to your audio recording.

I don’t know why I never thought of that. It’s probably because I’ve been too focused on extracting the audio from video files where the visuals add little or nothing, the better to listen to them on my MP3 player while driving. Now I just have to find time in my schedule to go back and do it with some of my presentations.

On the down side, 101 Things could have benefited from the services of a book designer, as there are some odd page breaks and layout issues. Those are only a minor distraction, as the repeated references to the Commercial Creation Center are a minor annoyance.

If you’re a podcaster or a podcasting/media consultant, buy this e-book for your clients—but read it yourself first to help you pitch them.

SRG

Podcastus Overproductus in its most severe form causes show hosts to compound the damage done by the sound clips with a fake DJ voice and a hokey script, resulting in a nightmare cross between a morning zoo radio show and a children’s television program.

One painful example of this syndrome can be found at BASF’s Chemical Reporter podcast. The idea is brilliant: explain the chemistry at work in daily life by answering questions like “Why does salt melt ice?” After only a few episodes, the listener becomes possessed by the desire to bash the podcast host over the head with a blunt object.

Alas, this compulsion to advertise drives away the very listeners the show’s sponsors are paying to reach. When each episode is less than ten minutes long, inserting pre-roll, mid-roll, and post-roll spots causes hapless listeners to hit the “unsubscribe” button as quickly as possible.

Another form of this pernicious condition includes repeating the same advertisement several times during one episode. Recent studies suggest that the phenomenon is even more maddening in video than in audio, but anyone who has ever listened to Voice America might contest that claim.

If you are an interviewer and you suspect that your guest suffers from Podcastus Desiccatus, there are steps you can take to prevent this disaster. One option is to lubricate the guest with a generous supply of single malt whiskey or Belgian chocolate, thus rendering him or her relaxed and expansive. Another is to bring in a third person to help you create a conversation about the subject, rather than a lecture. (The best person to bring in might be someone who disagrees with your guest.)

You can also do some research and prepare questions that focus the interview on the most interesting material, or that provoke an unrehearsed response. But if you’re interviewing them in person, start with method one.

Thanks to Michele Holtz for suggesting this syndrome at a geek dinner this summer.

While various people claimed in 2007 that podcasting (or at least the word ‘podcast’) was dead, the truth seems to be that podcasting is just now entering business consciousness for everyone except those who pursue every shiny new toy that comes along.

The 2007 podcasts included several episodes on the intersection of new media and publishing, as well as panels on book reviews, US vs. UK publishing, and markets. If you’re a writer of any kind, you’ll want to tune in for these.

The next BEA is at the end of May, 2008, so the series should be starting up again soon. Meanwhile, you can catch up on the archives at http://bookexpocast.com/.

‘The Connected Generation’ itself is not so much an age range (though many episodes do talk about relating to Generation Y) as an attitude. Most podcasters, and many podcast listeners, belong to this group. You might want to recommend it to those who haven’t drunk the social media Kool-Aid.

Listen or subscribe at http://www.reachgroupconsulting.com/blog/.

Production has been a bit irregular as of late (April 2008), but you can cruise the archives for tips on everything from writing to social media to inter-generational relations to finding a job.

Listen or subscribe at http://www.forward-moving.com/blog/category/podcast/.

If you want to know about e-mail marketing, SEO, the importance of your house list, and other tricks of the trade from people who make their living doing this kind of thing, you should definitely have a listen.

And the miracle of podcasting is such that you don’t have to get up at 6 AM to meet them in Dunkin Donuts.

Listen or subscribe at www.marketingovercoffee.com.

And none of that matters. This is a great podcast. For those who haven’t heard of him and his many books, David Maister is a Famous Consultant who has always believed in the value of giving things away. Right now the podcast is a special series of combined audio and PDF files containing excerpts from his latest book, Strategy and the Fat Smoker.

The premise of the book is that most of us (and our consulting clients) already need to know what we do for our businesses, the same way we already know what to do for our health. But we persist in our old habits anyway. I’m convinced this is the business book of the year. (Yes, even as much as I like Seth Godin.)

Run-don’t-walk on over to http://davidmaister.com/podcasts/ and subscribe.

There are many possible causes for Podcastus Interruptus. For instance, the proverbial Person from Porlock could knock at the door and destroy the idea for the episode—or just the mood of the podcaster. Recording software could crash in the middle of an interview, or the podcaster could forget to press the “record” button.

In other instances of Podcastus Interruptus, the podcaster succeeds in making a recording, or even several recordings, but something delays the editing and/or posting of the episode. The culprit could be anything from illness to a sudden onset of billable work—or the need to complete one’s doctoral degree.

New podcasters may find themselves intimidated by the need to learn to use editing software, create a podcast feed, or register with iTunes. Those whose entire future as podcasters is put at risk by such difficulties should consult the Asylum immediately in order to avoid podcast stillbirth.

“The Writing Show provides information and inspiration for writers of all kinds. Whether you write fiction, nonfiction, screenplays, songs, games, manuals, ads, reports, reviews, or poetry, we’re here to entertain, help, and engage you.

Every week or so, we offer a new podcast designed to shed light on some aspect of writing, writers, publishing, and other topics of interest to people who write. We also post articles and other resources to help writers craft their works, get published, market their material, and just feel inspired.”

Recommended by Matthew Wayne Selznick (one of her interviewees).

Listen or subscribe at http://www.writingshow.com/.

I Should be Writing is “The podcast for wanna-be fiction writers, by a wanna-be fiction writer,” where Mur discusses “rejection, cover letters and getting the oomph to keep going.”

Mur’s fans are legion, but it was Matthew Wayne Selznick (also a writer) who recommended her for this list.

Listen or subscribe at http://isbw.murlafferty.com/.

Mignon says, “I always enjoy Emily Bazelon’s commentary. It’s not the same when she’s away.” And it’s true: the dynamics of the group change when it’s just the guys.

Listen or subscribe on the Slate website.

“When not inventing new recipes, researching for the show, and longing for a pair of organic cotton jeans, Tanja moonlights as the host of Freshtopia.net. Not solely a wizard in the kitchen, Tanja is increasingly well versed on issues of sustainability, gardening, composting, and green products. She also serves as the show’s co-producer, co-writer, and walking thesaurus. She hopes to, by example, prove sustainable living is both sane and fun.”

Listen or subscribe at the  Freshtopia website.

“Open yourself to provocative, cutting edge, experimental ideas on loving yourself more, healing relationships, understanding men, attracting what you desire, the new art of seduction and the evolution of love that will radically shift the way you date and relate.”

Recommended by Sandy Shepard.

Listen or subscribe at Personal Life Media.

Recommended by Sandy Shepard.

Listen or suscribe on the Mudra Moments Blog.